


Dream Lover

by Nocturnesan



Category: xxxHoLic
Genre: Angst, Dreams, M/M, Memories
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-03-12
Updated: 2018-03-20
Packaged: 2019-03-30 15:30:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,141
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13954566
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nocturnesan/pseuds/Nocturnesan
Summary: Watanuki doesn't remember how long it's been since he took over the Shop of Wishes, his life sliding into an endless series of meaninglessness.One summer night the old ache of want for one long gone once again haunts him..





	1. The Burden of you

How long had it been now? Since that fateful day when he’d tearfully promised the fleeting dream of Yuuko that he’d wait for her. When his life was softly changed, his usual days coming to a quiet halt. He’d sacrificed his freedom, his friends, everything he knew, for a chance that someday, someday she would return. But how long? The years all blended together after awhile, at least after the first ten or so. Those had been..painful, difficult, troublesome.. He’d gotten hurt a lot as he slowly learned how to manage payment for wishes, as his powers and intuition grew. 

But over time he became settled in the way of things, his days quiet, with only visits from Doumeki and the occasional customer to liven them. Though he wouldn’t admit it openly, he dearly looked forward to the time when Doumeki would come to the store, bringing him groceries or other sundries. He would ask of the outside world, inquire into the lives of those he had left behind. After all, they should live their own lives, though they could come to the shop, he softly asked them not to and over time they all but stopped. 

It was only the old, familiar banter with Doumkei and Mokona that kept his mind from wandering too much. He was not lonely, not as some might think. After all he had Maru, Moro and Mokona, and the presence of others from time to time. But even as he was not alone, but was all the same filled with some empty sort of melancholy. The pain had faded to a dull ache after so many years, but there were times when he’d swear he would see or hear some trace of things he’d considered long forgotten and he would feel it fresh as if if it had just happened. 

He lived in a world of dreams, ones that allowed him to move from place to place, at least after a fashion. But when he thought on it, his life had always been a dream, hadn’t it? From the moment he’d stumbled upon this shop and even now. Separating the real from the unreal slowly became impossible, to the point where he had no idea which was which anymore. 

It was the same tonight, the humid summer hair still in his sleeping chambers, despite his best efforts to keep the room open and a breeze going with a magical fan that he’d gotten as payment for something some years ago. He had no energy at all, not having even bothered to cook more than a light, simple meal. There had been no customers for weeks, and aside from the nightly visits of Doumeki he could not keep track of the passing of the days. 

Doumeki, yes, his mind was on the other tonight. He had forgotten, after awhile, which one this was. They blended together now, all he knew was that they were not his Doumkei..no...Shizuka. The one who had started all of this, who’d faithfully visited him in his waking hours, just as his grandfather Haruka so often did in his sleeping ones. He fondly reminisced about those early days with the other, how angry and foolish he’d been. 

Lifting a hand, he would cup it over the eye had was not his, half of one who was now dead. Unbidden, the tears would come, hot and salty as they slid down his cheeks. It did nothing to help the stifling atmosphere of his room. Moving his hand away, he would curl his long, slender fingers down into the soft covers beneath him, body shifting heavily across the sheets. 

“Shizuka..” The silken brocade of his simple yukata felt heavy against his skin as he raised a hand to brush the soft folds away from his chest. Nails curled down against his chest, clawing down against his chest, in the spot over his aching heart. He’d never spoken words of affection to the man, not wanting to burden him more than he already had. Shizuka’s eye rested firm still in his head, and the man’s very blood mingled with his own. In that way, they were more one than any two people could ever hope to be….but he longed for more than the painful memories and empty reminders of the other. 

If he could only fulfill his own wishes, he would have Yuuko and Shizuka back. He would go back to those difficult, but wonderful days when he was but a foolish young student, afraid of things that he did not understand. Now he knew too much, too well and none of it brought him any comfort as he writhed unhappily in the bed. His toes flexing and digging down into the sheets as he shifted again. Hand clawed the fabric away from him entirely, tossing it with frustration across the room. A low, frustrated growl in his throat, one that sounded almost inhuman. But what was he anymore? A dream, a rough memory of someone who was some odd mistake of circumstance. 

A rough sort of anger and pain lanced through him, as he sat up. Naked and covered in a thin sheen of sweat, he would pad out to the porch, sliding himself down onto the various pillows that rested there, he would shift his mismatched gaze up to the cloudless sky, lips parted slightly. “Shizuka...” The stars glittered softly overhead, offering him no answers or reprieve from his feelings. 

Groaning softly, he would slid his eyes shut, sprawling his naked, lanky form over the pillows, uncaring. The soft scent of the incense he kept burning would eventually help him to lull off to sleep, sleep that he could only hope would help to bring him some sort of empty satisfaction to the problems of his lonely reality..


	2. Broken dream

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Watanuki's dreams are far too real, but they still do nothing to ease the ache in his body and soul, especially when they vanish all too quickly.

The heat seemed almost unbearable, sweat trickling down over his skin, humid air choking his lungs. He noticed as all the stifling feelings lifted, a cool breeze brushing across his bare skin. The scent of the insect repelling incense softened, replaced instead by summer blossoms. The breeze rustled the boughs of the trees and bushes in the garden that lay not far from where he lay. The night was quiet now, only the soft trill of a some distant bird breaking the otherwise peaceful silence. So he heard too easily, as he roused from his restless sleep the sound of shifting footsteps across the bare wooden floors of the shop. Heavy footfalls that sounded too familiar and yet strange to him at the same time. 

His odd-eyes would open slowly as he sat up from the pillows he’d finally found some remorse from the hallow restlessness that had overcome him. Reaching up with a slender hand, he would brush some stray hair from his face as he turned his attention in the direction of the noise. Into his view stepped a handsome form, draped in a loose soft gray yukata, sharp eyes settled upon his mostly nude form, drawing a faint flush to Watanuki’s cheeks. He didn’t know why he felt at all embarrassed, after so many years it was not as if much phased him anymore, but having Doumeki’s eyes upon him, it felt..tantalizing. 

But..the figure who stepped closer to him was not just any Doumeki, and that was when he realized he must still be dreaming. 

“Shizuka..” 

Came the faint whisper from his lips as he sat up straighter, a hint of shock playing over his features for a moment. His lips pursed slightly, before a gentle laugh bubbled forth from his chest. “I see..” Letting out a heavy sigh, he would start to climb to his feet, only to have the other move quickly to his side, kneeling to press him back with a strong hand against his chest. 

“Kimihiro..” 

The man’s voice send a shiver through Watanuki’s slender form, a sweet thrill of hearing his name fall from the long dead man’s lips. A quip played through his mind, but died quickly on his lips as he reached up to brush his fingers softly over the other’s cheek. 

“Shizuka. I’m sorry...surely you wish to be resting, but instead you are here in this foolish fantasy with me..” 

He could feel the welling of tears at the corners of his eyes, the heat of them rolling down his cheeks as he gazed with bitter elation upon the other. The painful knowledge that only in a dream could he be with the other ached in his chest. All the same, he felt as if he was blessed, to have any chance at all for this was truly a gift. 

Shizuka shook his head, a faint smirk tugging at the edge of his usually impassive lips. “I have rested plenty. That is the way of such things after all.” His head ducked down to press forehead against Kimihiro’s own, his eyes sliding shut. 

Cool, but comforting was the feeling of the other’s touch, and Watanuki found that he could not help but savor it. “Idiot, don’t say such nonsense to me..and stop being so sweet.” He laughed, lightly pushing the other away as he sat up. “It’s not like you, this isn’t like me either.” He shifted slightly, pulling himself up again as he curled his fingers down against the other man’s shoulder. “But I regret...so much.”   
Shizuka chuckled again, pulling away a bit so that he could regard Kimihiro, his head tilting slightly to the side. “It is odd, I’ll admit. I find I want to eat your cooking and tease you. But I suppose those days are behind us now, hmm? You have my legacy now, I think my boys will keep you on your toes.” He grinned faintly. “Though I wish that I could taste your cooking again and drink with you and Mokona….”

“Pff, it was always food and booze with you! Just like Yuuko! I swear I’m cursed.” Watanuki snorted, looking away a bit. “Your grandfather was never annoying, you should try to be more like him.”

“Hah, you love him too hmm?”

Cheeks pinks as cherry blossoms, Watanuki would growl and shove at Shizuka. “Maybe I just like him more! He’s handsome, but everything that you aren’t!” 

“Mmm, maybe, but I think I’m the one in your heart, hmm?” He shifted and shoved the other back against the pillows again, leaning over Kimihiro as he let out a small growl. “And you are the one who is dreaming of me, so I’m not worried.” A hand would shift to slide softly up Watanuki’s thigh, fingers curling down against his hip. “But enough talk and games, I think you want something more out of me..”

“I...” Watanuki bit his lower lip slightly, tilting his head away from the other, his gaze past Shizuka’s shoulder, focusing instead on the curtains of his bed softly shifting in the breeze. Of course he wanted it, but he still couldn’t bring himself to say it. It felt foolish and against some still stubborn part of him. 

Shizuka rolled his eyes a bit, but said nothing. Instead he would lower his head to press lips hotly against Kimihiro’s own. Free hand shifting to pull the other tightly against him as his tongue pressed between parting, needy lips. 

Watanuki couldn’t help himself as he responded eagerly, his hands moving to free the belt of the yukata and reveal the beautifully toned form of the man beneath the fabric. His heart caught in his throat as fingers slid over that lightly tanned chest. He groaned into the kiss, his body rising up against the stronger one above him just a bit. 

“Watanuki...” 

The words were a whisper in his mind, until they repeated again, more forcefully this time. 

“Watanuki!” 

The sweet sensations all abruptly fell away from him as he was startled from his deep sleep. Eyes flashed open, turning wrathfully upon the source of his wakefulness. “Damnit Mokona!” He growled, sitting up heavily and grabbing up the black creature. “It better be very, very important!” He realized as he woke more that the sun’s rays were stretching across the garden. 

Mokona squirmed out of his grasp, big eyes staring over at him. “Watanuki is mean!” It wailed, huffing a bit. “Mokona just came to tell you to get up! Watanuki might catch a cold.” 

With a heavy sigh, he climbed to his feet, a hand shifting to brush against his lips. “Yes, yes. I understand. I’m sorry, Mokona. I’m going to go clean up and then I’ll make breakfast..Doumeki should be here soon I’m sure..” 

The ache from the previous night only felt as if it had increased, his soul feeling raw and his body wanting. He only hoped that tonight might offer him some more kindness and let him finish his dreams this time..

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And here we have the second chapter. Without the smut, sorry folks. XD I decided after writing that much it should be kinda teasy. We'll see what happens next chapter. I think maybe there will be one or two more? Not sure right now..


End file.
